Growing up can be rough! When I listen to my brothers speak about their childhood and compare it to others… I realized we may not have had the best of childhoods or the best of circumstances compared to others… but it is mine and it helped me become the person I am today.

Being the oldest child of four I saw the things my dad went through… and the choices he had to make as a single dad of 4 kids, while serving in the military trying to keep things together.  He did the best he could with what he had.  Even when people he thought he could trust were quick to hurt him.  Sometimes he used anger to stay focused… and when I went through my own dark days as a single parent… I understood why.  Sometimes it was anger or determination that got you out of bed in a cruel and unjust world.  From him I learned real men do cry… and then somehow they get up and find the strength to try and make things better… Continue reading →

For the last almost 4 or 5 weeks I have been in pain.  The pregnancy belly has disappeared.  I lost 15 lbs and I am barely maintaining where I am at now.  If your following me on Instagram you will notice that I have started juicing.  I was turned on to the idea will curled up in pain and using Netflix to distract me.  “Dying to Know” and “Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead” created an aha moment.

The first was, woe is me I wish I had learned about juicing and was able to share it with Oma before she died the night before Christmas.  It would have been worth a try…

The second was, I could do this for my own health! Continue reading →

On Mother’s Day I suspected that I might have something growing inside of me, but I was in denial.  I needed more proof of any such thing.  “I am just sick… this happens to sick people right?”  At least that was what I telling myself.  After 2 weeks of body racking nausea and 10 lbs of unnatural weight-loss, I have come to reconcile with the mini-me parasite growing within my body and the primitive attempts to communicate with me… Sheesh! Next time, just take over my body.  I promise it will be a lot easier for both of us.

Apparently this whole ordeal was the baby’s way of knife-handing me instructions about what he or she does not like… meat is a no-no… fruit and veggies are good for you. < Seriously if this is any indication, then  I predict this kid has a lot of… *ahem* personality… >

I actually only confirmed these instructions the other day… Continue reading →